Saturday, September 7, 2013

So You All Say to Embrace This

I've been thinking a lot about my last post and Lil's most recent post, click here to read it, if you haven't already.

This is the way I see it, I can fight all these feelings and crawl deeper into myself away from Mr. S, I can try to go back to the way things where before, or I can listen to all of you.

I could do the first, it would be comfortable, but I would be nothing, no one, empty. The second isn't an option. Which leaves my third option. 

I will do my best to be open and honest with Mr. S, and if that means leaving myself vulnerable so be it. I will try to embrace and enjoy all of this. I will try to forget what I have to loose and remember what I have to gain. 

I trust Mr. S with my kids lives and I will trust him everything that I am; my mind/body/soul is nothing compared to my kids lives. 

It will not be easy but when has anything of worth been easy to achieve?

16 comments:

  1. i know it's tough. trust me, I still having moments of "omg, can i do this." the rewards are so worth it. i stayed the journey in April. it has been really slow, which has helped. i've done more things than I ever thought possible. i've shared deepest dark secrets with Him that I've never shared with anyone.

    what you are learning is to trust Him in a way you never have. that is going to take tone. He will request things of you that you will be embarrassed, humiliated, degraded, etc...it doesn't last. What helps me get through it is knowing the reward of aftercare, the reward of playing Him, the reward of hearing "good girl".


    If you get a chance, go back and read through done of the bloggers earlier posts. Blog about your questions or email us. i've made some good bonds and have one sub who i text- a lot. She has become a great source for me.

    You will be going through sub frenzy, but you will get through it. Research both blogs and other material available. Task to Him verbally or through email. Share with Him and just wait. Remember, everything is on His own time. Communicate though. I always tell Sir how i feel, what i think i need to make next time better, what was missing that would help me next time, etc. He doesn't share much back with me via words, but His actions show that He really listened to what i shared.

    Truly, embrace it. Both the good and bad.

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    1. I can not thank you enough for this advice! it is a lot to take in and I don't think I can properly reply right now but I am very grateful.

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  2. dang auto correct...let me know if I need to translate.

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  3. Hi Misty!

    I couldn't have said it any better than His slut did. ..even with the auto correct LOL

    Embrace everything...the good, the bad, the ugly. If you trust Mr. S then everything will fall into place. Being vulnerable and exposed is never easy, even with the person that is closest to you. But I think in the end you will be so glad you let your guard down.

    I think it's a great idea for you to look back to some of the other blogs earlier posts. You'd be amazed at how many were feeling the same thing you are.

    Keep reaching out....everyone is here to support you!

    Subrina <3

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    1. Thank you for the support! It really means a lot!

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  4. Misty, it's a lot to take in. It's harder when you read all these subs, even though are at different levels, are at levels you almost feel you well never reach. Remember, this is your journey. Make it what you want. Write about what you need, to use as advice seeking, getting out your feelings for yourself, and to share those hot moments, how you felt about the scene, how it's changing you, changing your relationship, what you've learned about yourself, etc. As the days go by, you will refer back to them and see how much you've grown.

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    1. In this short time I have figured out that writing is something that calms me, so this I can do :). Now everything else, continues to bring me close to hyperventilation.

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  5. It is difficult, so dont set your goals too high, or expect it all to fall into place instantly, time is on your side, there are going to be bumps in the road but just remember every bump is an experience to learn from.

    x

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    1. Oh I have no illusions when it comes to things falling into place, I actually see things going wrong, lol.

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  6. You will be fine. There's good and bad in everything in life. I'm just as inexperienced as you in this but for sir and I it came down to trust honesty and respect not just for the relationship but for myself internally as well. :). Lots of love

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  7. ... And I think my wording on inexperienced wasn't the apt. Wording. Sorry maybe new to this lifestyle would be more apt.

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    1. Lol, inexperienced works just fine

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  8. When it comes down to being comfortable or being truly happy.... Always choose happiness. Your true self is waiting there for you, however long the road might be to get there. There will be hurdles, Misty... I think anyone with sound advice will have already told you this; but there won't be any not worth jumping.

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    1. "Your true self is waiting there for you..." I can't tell you how much I want this! It's hard to fathom being myself.

      As long as stumbling, not jumping, over the hurdles is okay, I think I will make it to the end. :)

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