Am I a hoarder of psychological walls?
Bear with me here.
A hoarder holds onto many items for one reason or another, mostly, I would think, they hold onto an item because it has a sentimental value or just in case they might need it one day.
Is that what I've been doing with these walls, have I been holding onto them just in case I might need them one day?
For instance, this wall of not needing, I haven't needed it since I stop talking to my dad 13ish years ago, yet it is still there, tightly locked away. I don't want to throw it away because what if I need it again. What if?!?!
I wonder if hoarders feel like I feel now, when people try to make them throw away their things. I am hugging this wall tight, screaming and fighting for it. I feel like part if me is being taken away against my will. Except it is me that is taking it away from me.
Am I aloud to put it in storage for awhile or do I really have to throw it away? Maybe I could add a door with a lock and give Mr. S the key, so he is the only one that can get through... or maybe it could have a lock and padlocks.... or maybe a lock, padlocks, and one of those fancy iris scanner locks.
Would that be okay? Truly! I need to hold onto it, just in case.