We were talking last night -after we did some really fun stuff- about random things and some how we got on the subject of me not doing what I'm told, which turned into us talking about punishment.
I need to make a couple things clear. We have talked about punishment before (multiple times), he knows why I want it, why I think I need it, etc., and I have tried really hard to be clear about those things. I shared all of your comments on my last post, so he knows how it works, or doesn't work, for others. We are also going through an extremely stressful time right now, he has a lot on his plate, he is worried about being able to provide for his family (he does a wonderful job providing but, you know, men will be men).
He feels like I should do what I am told, the first time he tells me. And the thing is I should... but...
I explained that I don't mean to forget, I don't mean to be disrespectful and unpleasant, and I need help.
Bottom line, I'm going to have to figure it out on my own (his words, "help yourself."). If I want to make him happy then I need to figure out how to behave and act without discipline, and I will do that because I do want to make him happy.
Not that punishment is never going to happen but, at the moment, it is not looking good. So, I guess, my last post was wrong.
I have to go. I can't talk about this anymore...