Saturday, June 28, 2014

Next Week

I haven't had a lot of time to spend around these parts lately; very little time for reading other blogs (and honestly, I haven't felt much like reading, for various reasons) and I haven't even answered comments on my last couple posts. I'm feeling pretty bad about all of this, but when Master tells me I have fifteen minutes -or whatever amount of time- I use it to write...

The last few days -well yesterday was better- I haven't done so great with my schedule. Master understands, and I kinda wish he didn't...

I'm not going to beat myself up about it this time. If he can justify it, then so can I.

But next time, despite what else is going on, I will do better.

I could have done better this time...nope not going there, not going to let it happen! If he thinks I did a good job, than I can...I really didn't do a good job...sigh....this isn't working.

I just don't know what my problem is! Why can I not do these simple fucking things?! I feel like I've let him and my kids down, but I haven't...so why do I feel that way? It's not like the house is dirty, or unsafe, or anything.

Maybe, this time, I've just let myself down.

And to top it off, I've been upset with Master for not thinking I could have done better, and that's not fair.

*Deep breath*

Next week, I will do better.

6 comments:

  1. Your main goal is pleasing Him...sounds like you are doing that...breathe..and relax a little.
    hugs abbby

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    Replies
    1. abby, I've really let my own expectations get in the way of seeing that he is happy...Ugh, this submission stuff isn't easy

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  2. maybe you can take me with you..i need to do better too!

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    Replies
    1. little, all we can do is try :)

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  3. Aww Misty, don't be too hard on yourself. Abby is right, and if he is happy you should be too :)

    ((Hugs))
    Roz

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    Replies
    1. Roz, it's hard not to be hard on myself, but you and abby are right...I really need to remember how good he is at pointing out when I could have done better.

      Delete

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