I'm very leery of moving forward, however we are moving forward.
I think it's just hard to accept how much I need this, you know? Even harder to admit to it...
We had a night without kids (and I screwed it up), I cried a lot and talked a lot, and then it got better. Nonetheless, we needed a kid-free night.
He changed the hours that I'm supposed to wear my plug and I now have to put on the leash with the collar.
I'm not allowed to mope, either (I will do my best, but no promises).
I also learned that the crop does not feel good on my feet--not that I thought it would, but you know.
It is a possibility that he will start reading my journal. I'm not sure how to feel about that. I mean, it's not like there's stuff in there I want to hide from him, but...I don't know. I'm sure it would help.
I'm just leery.
This is where I'm at.